There really is nothing like children’s laughter.  And I don’t think it is accidental that children laugh more in the sunny weather!  Sunny days bring families together in so many enjoyable ways; playgrounds that offer time to run, climb and swing, picnics that establish playful relationships with family and friends, neighborhood walks in the late afternoon and just relaxing on the porch.

And all of these wonderful things help children learn so much.

When you take time to make time for your children, everything that happens is helping them learn. 

Casual conversations help children learn strategies to communicate; I talk and you wait and listen, then you talk and I wait and listen, we stand or sit together, look at each other & pay attention only to each other and say things that make sense to our topic… while this seems so easy and “standard” to us, it is a critical and often difficult skill for young children.  They learn it and become good at it through high opportunity to practice.  And that good model and practice depends on you.

Seeing you as a play partner helps children know that what they are good at makes you proud.  This establishes lifelong connections and support of a healthy relationship.  It teaches children to take care of their bodies through learned safety practices and to keep their bodies strong through exercise and healthy habits; climbing, swinging and running is pure exercise – and your kids are good at it!  Take a bag of grapes and bottles of water to the playground as snacks; honestly children will love it when it becomes the standard instead of candy and sugar drinks.

Including children in family and neighborhood get-togethers establishes children in what is often referred to as “their pack.”  There is no question that we are Better Together (B.Bos).  Success in society-and life- relies on the ability to establish and maintain supportive and positive relationships.  Children recognize this very early.  As they grow, establish their role (which changes as their skills develop) in the group, invite their participation, ask for their ideas and celebrate all of the ways that life is better when your children are with you.  This teaches them responsibility, follow through and, most importantly, that who they are and what they think is influential, worthwhile and good!

Laugh with your child.  Really laugh with your child.  Children are funny and find great joy in what we used to find great joy in, but now are too busy to “see”.  It is my experience that babies are just waiting for you to smile and clap; this is great fun and makes them laugh.  Toddlers think it is a riot if you make up silly words and sing them; they know the words are wrong (but not really why) and this makes them laugh.  Preschoolers just plain think you’re funny because they like you, and school agers laugh at silly jokes and stories. 

At all ages, your child wants and needs you to laugh with them. It is good for them, it is better for you.

“Uncle Bryan is hilarious!  Did you hear him laughing so hard?!” C.J.S. age 7, an adoring nephew.

Walking through child care centers and schools in May, there is a noticeable slide to the maternal side of families. Children are engaged in so many activities and lessons that center on their moms. You can’t go into a store without noticing cards and gift ideas that smell nice, look pretty or promise that moms will love to be treated like a “queen for a day.”

And I think about all the ways children learn about mothers in the world and that special lady that they call their own.
This is a little song being sung in a preschool classroom that has created special pictures of children with their moms and their favorite animal with its mom. It is adorable.

“Be kind to your web-footed friends, A duck may be somebody’s mother.” Silly childhood song

Really – mothers come in all shapes and sizes. The smallest lady bugs, the grizzliest bears and the scaliest lizards all have mothers. And each one protects and cares for her babies in a special way.
Mothers are revered in sonnets and songs. They are immortalized in poem and prose. They are central in drama and dance. Mothers are celebrated on special days and every day.
During this beautiful springtime month of May, enjoy being a mom, a grandma, a special woman in a child’s life and an important part of their family.
Read stories and talk about being a mom with your child. Snuggle up with your little one and read these beautiful books about mothers; The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn, I Love You Stinky Face by Lisa McCourt Copy Me, Copy Cub by Richard Edwards and I Will Love You Forever by Robert Munsch. Take some time and really relax for a few minutes with your baby in your arms, your toddler on your lap, your preschooler warm and wrapped up on the couch or your school ager sitting so close that you are breathing in unison. Childhood goes very quickly.
Children celebrate mothers in many ways; with beautiful painted portraits and handmade cards, by planting flowers and decorating pots. There will be set tables and delicious desserts that mom loves. Children will be on their best behavior (at least for a while), and proudly present handmade jewelry and key chains – which are the very best gifts. Cookouts and fancy brunch will be part of special days, every family will tell mom, in absolute certainty, that she is the best mom ever!
And each mom will love it because as children grow and change, a mother’s love does not.

“When you were small and just a touch away, I covered you with blankets against the cold night air. But now that you are tall and out of reach, I fold my hands and cover you with prayer.” Dona Maddux Cooper

Happy Mother’s Day

The first Earth Day celebration was on April 22, 1970 (43 years ago Monday!)  This year, more than 1 billion people are expected to attend and participate in Earth Day celebrations around the world. This year's theme is "The Face of Climate Change." This is a very mature theme.

Most adults have learned about what the 1970's were like in terms of unrest and activism and understand that this was the catalyst for a national effort to celebrate and protect the earth.  Adults also can comprehend past climate changes and weather patterns.

And even though the Weather Channel has a staggering amount of viewers, young children haven’t learned an Earth Day history and have very limited ability to compare climate changes.  Even though our children don’t have the same understanding as adults about Earth Day, there are many ways that we can teach our children to love and protect the earth!

Pay attention as a family; Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.  Talk about history – this was the tag line for a very successful and sustaining Earth Day campaign in the 1990s. If you Google reduce, reuse, recycle for kids there are many sites that provide information and activities for all age groups.  But it starts at home with adults that model responsible actions and provide language that directs and supports children’s progress in taking care of themselves, their family, their neighborhood and their world.  Help children sort in recycling bins, think about what they use & discard and find crafts to turn a coffee can into a flower pot!

Clean up; while we find yard work another task that needs to be done, children love it!  With an eye for safety – spend a few hours this week picking up litter that has collected in trees, bushes and lawns over the winter.  Grab rakes, a bag or basket and pick-up sticks and twigs. Get a garden plot ready for seeds.  Put out the bird feeders when you check on trees that are budding in spring.  Squirt the driveway and sweep the curb.  Young children need child-size gloves and tools while they help clean up “their” earth.

Get involved; schools, neighborhoods, communities and cities celebrate Earth Day.  Find out what is going on in your community and get involved as a family.  Young children get involved with songs, words and movement.  Read books about the Earth; land, water and air.  Try It’s Earth Day Little Critter by Mercer Mayer and Earth Day – Hooray! By Stuart Murphy as an introduction for children.  Don’t be afraid to make up a little song & dance in celebration of this beautiful world that we live in! Join celebrations and activities.

“Kids and Earth Day are a natural combination -- with their sense of wonder and excitement about the natural environment, as well as their boundless energy. Earth Day is the perfect time to get them involved in games, the arts, music, crafts and anything else that celebrates their world outside.“                    Publisher: Extended Notes Beyond the Classroom

Young children are often thought of as sensory loaded body learners.

What does this mean?

We have 5 senses: sight, taste, touch, smell and hearing.  We are born with these senses and they become fine-tuned in an incredibly short time in our lives.  At birth, babies’ unclear vision line is about 12 inches, becoming more and more focused; typically they achieve 20/20 vision by 2 years old. (www.about.com) Their senses of touch, smell and taste are influenced not only by their world at birth, but in utero (Origins by Annie Paul).  Hearing is also a significant sense that is one of our windows to the world. “The inner ear is fully developed by the time a mother is about 20 weeks pregnant, and babies are born with fully developed hearing – so your baby is ready to listen and learn from the get-go.” (www.babycenter.com)  Hearing is the gateway to language.

Children learn with and through their whole body.  Children learn best when we invite them to use every bit of their bodies from head to toe!  Young children have amazing muscle development. Starting from their trunk and moving through extremities, in very quick time children literally stretch and expand their muscles to provide them with balance, locomotion and reach.  Within 18 months, babies go from lying flat on their backs to walking.  They are born with clenched fists that they hold tight to their chests. Within a year they are sitting in high chairs feeding themselves cheerios and holding a spoon for their yogurt. (www.cdc.gov/milestones) Movement allows children access to the world.                                                                                      

What does this mean?

The more you talk about the way things smell, look and sound, the more your child learns.  Talk, talk, talk to your children. “Oral language is a key indicator of school success” (Read to Succeed Buffalo.)  Sing songs, tell stories and read. Listen to bells, drums, barking and horns – identify each one.  Invite children into the kitchen when you cook and offer the smells of cinnamon, garlic, oranges and lavender.  Have a taste test: peach jelly tastes different than grape – help children discover their favorites.  Soft blankets feel, look and smell different than stones which are different than corduroy which is different than snow.  Young children don’t know this.  Teach them.

To support your child’s growth, development and learning provide, advocate for and participate in active, big body games like chase, kick ball, jumping, climbing and soccer.  Go to the playground.  Start a family exercise club.  Pay attention to balance, coordination and strength.  As children grow, match their toys to their abilities; sidewalk chalk becomes fine markers, big bouncy balls become ping pong balls and bend-and-stretch exercises progress to jumping jacks and yoga. Bouncing baby dance steps gracefully become ballet.  Make sure you are a dance partner; all of this seems to happen overnight.

“Don’t blink. Life goes faster than you think.”  songwriter Kenny Chesney

What if you had the chance to truly build strong relationships with your children and teach them important lessons along the way?  Would you take it?  I hope so.

Well, you do have that chance every day.  That “chance” is sitting down and eating together as a family. This seemingly small, and what used to be the unquestioned act of every family, is so important that experts are now advocating for it in the medical and educational arenas.

The American Academy of Pediatrics calls child obesity a national epidemic. Empty calories, high snacks, drive through dinners and grab & go everything along with stagnant, indoor, “single setting” play (i.e. video and computer games) is taking its toll on children and families.

“Today the average family's schedules and the convenience of restaurant meals have decreased the time people spend preparing and eating food together… [which] affects immediate and long-term {physical and mental} health.” S. Berger & R. Robertson Healthy Children Healthy Lives: The Wellness Guide.

I think that because it seems impossible, we make it impossible.  And because it really is easier to go through a drive through than prep, cook then clean dinner foods, or feed children, then adults at different times – we do.  Conversation with families about mealtime always leads to balance; balancing schedules, balancing convenience with guilt, balancing attention and balancing time demands. 

So try a balance.

If you truly don’t have a family meal together at all, start slowly and work your way up. Weekend mornings are a great place to start.  Get children to help.  Serve fruit, cereal, toast and eggs.  Put the baby in the highchair and sit at the table in pjs.  Add a lunch of sandwiches, chocolate milk and pretzels once weekend breakfast becomes established.  Summer’s coming….this is the perfect time for grilling and paper plates.  Important note: No television – table, food & family only.

The week is much busier and can be tricky because of work, school and sport schedules.  But not impossible!  Plan ahead (I know, easier said than done, but not impossible!)  Shop, plan for, then cook food that has multiple uses i.e. crock pot chicken on Monday is pulled chicken sandwiches on Tuesday.  There are many, many recipes for family friendly foods that can be cooked and served throughout the week.  The table doesn’t have to be fancy, it just needs to be yours. Important note: Everyone eats at the same time.

What is the benefit of at least the balance of meals shared together as a family?  Memories that will last a life time.  Memories of conversations, unexpected pleasure and excitement, memories of shared stories, the trials and tribulations of growing up.  Memories of games played and the true sense of connection and responsibility to the people we love the most.

It’s worth a try.

“There is something about a shared meal--not some holiday blowout, not once in a while but regularly, reliably--that anchors a family”  Nancy Gibbs The Magic of the Family Meal

The calendar tells us that spring is here.

The weather outside tells us differently.

I’m going with the calendar.

Spring!  Get ready for ---

Gardens:  dig out or buy some rubber boots for the whole family so you can step into dirt, stones and mulch.  Talk about last year and recall the rows and patterns of color in your garden.  Make a list of favorite colors and see if you can find seeds / flowers that match.  Show your children catalogues of seeds, vegetables and flowers.  Pick out the plants that you will grow when the weather is warm and sunny.  Cut out the pictures and make a Spring Collage to keep in the house before the real garden happens.  Seeds need shelter, rich soil, water, sunshine and you – design a growing chart.  All children love books about the beautiful space of a garden.                                                                                                 

Some favorites: Isabella’s Garden - Glenda Millard

The Carrot Seed - Ruth Krauss

Planting a Rainbow - Louis Ehlert

The Vegetable Alphabet Book - Jerry Pallotta

New Baby Animals:  listen and watch for little baby animals born in the spring.  Spring is literally a season of new birth.  Trees stretch their branches toward the sun showing off their springtime buds and robin’s nests and bunny burrows have little eggs and little ears growing each day!  This is the perfect time to teach children about their true responsibility to nurture and protect the earth as it begins again each year.  Take a trip to the zoo, fill a bird feeder at a window, and read stories all about baby animals. 

Some favorites: I Love Baby Animals - David Chuka

Peter Rabbit Stories - Beatrix Potter

An Animal Counting Book - Janet Shulmann

Animals in Spring - Martha Rustad

Changes in Weather:  snow clouds often become rainy, storm clouds in the spring, thunder and lightning can be very exciting!  When rain falls many things happen; gushy mud puddles appear, grass springs to life, clothes change to match warm, wet weather and families start thinking about picnics and outdoor parties. Warm spring wind invites sweatshirts and kites. Clear, bright days inspire us to fill buckets with sudsy water, clean out the garage and break out the sidewalk chalk. Read about the weather!                     

Some favorites: Little Critter: Just a Big Storm - Mercer Mayer

Clouds - Anne Rockwell

Down Comes the Rain - Franklyn Branley

Maisy’s Wonderful Weather Book - Lucy Cousins

 

“What is spring like? It is the sun shining on the rain and the rain falling on the sunshine...”

Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden

The very best way to show your child that you love them is to read to them. There is significant data that clearly identifies strong literacy; reading & writing, as the most critical indicator of school – and life – success.

*Books contain wonderful stories and songs that become beloved in a family.

*Cuddle up and read with children, they know they are loved and that you hold reading as a priority.

*Reading is fun; children can make different animal sounds and hear silly words.  Who doesn’t love that?

*Every time you read to your child, they hear your lovely voice which stays with them forever.

*The letters, words, and pictures you point to and the stories you read have meaning.

*Children are excited and love to find out that things come in different colors, sizes, and shape.

*More than anything we want our children to say “I love books & one day I will love to read on my own.”

Exchange Everyday (an early childhood professional journal) recently published a list of “families’ best loved children’s books.”  The titles are considered children’s classics.  These books are wonderful, if you haven’t read them to your children yet – today is a great day to start!

1.            The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle

2.            There’s an Alligator under My Bed by Mercer Mayer

3.            Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst

4.            Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown

5.            Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak

6.            The Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch

7.            The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

8.            Charlotte’s Web by E. B. White

9.            The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything by Linda Williams

10.          The Very Lazy Ladybug by Isobel Finn

"Children are made readers on the laps of their parents."

— Emilie Buchwald

We all know that flu season is among us.  Noses are drippy, we hear coughing everywhere and many of us have been “doctoring” our own aches and pains as well as our children’s.  Schools are busy sending home art projects of children’s traced and cut out hands pasted on paper with a Kleenex stuck in between.  The caption “Catch that sneeze, please!” is a favorite.

Elbows become “wellbows” for sneezing, winter hats, mittens, snowsuits and boots are being sorted and washed…again, and again. 

Ahhhh, another season preparing to fight the flu:

• Dress for the weather.
• Rest and sleep.
• Eat plenty of good foods and drink plenty of water.
• Get a flu vaccine.  

 Prevent the spread of germs by:

• Covering your nose and mouth with a tissue when coughing or sneezing. Throw the tissue away after use.
• Washing your hands often with soap and water, especially after coughing or sneezing.  If water is not available, use an alcohol-based hand cleaner.
• Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth. Germs spread this way!
• Change toothbrushes.  Use small tubes of toothpaste – (big ones last through coughs and colds & kids scrape their toothbrushes.)

I know, even when you try your hardest to avoid colds and flu, sometimes a little one ends up on the couch wrapped in a blanket and feeling yucky. 

Now what:

• Make sure you are taking care of yourself so that you can take care of them.  

• Change pillow cases.

• A favorite movie or music can be restful and make the time go by.

• Paper and crayons – a new coloring book or game to perk up for is welcome.

• Tea and Toast, hot soup, and snicker doodles always made my children better. 

The CDC has free downloadable resources available at http://www.cdc.gov/flu/freeresources/print.htm

    During every New Year’s Eve / New Year’s Day movie, event or party, the theme of Out with the old!  In with the New! is everywhere.  It is in songs, during the required New Year’s resolution discussion and in decorations.  This sounds a little like the classic shout of Henry VIII – “Off with their heads!”

    I am also reminded of the well – worn adage: “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water.”  How about “What goes around, comes around” and “Be careful what you wish for.  You just might get it.”  I think this is meant as good fun, but sometimes New Year’s requires a lot of thought and reflection.  Too much?   Really, what do you want to get rid of in this coming year?  What do you want to replace it with and what do you want to keep the same?  Hmmmm…

Some ideas:

What to get rid of:

∞Guilt that your family and home are not magazine ready every day.  Just so you know – no one’s is.  

 ∞Constant dread that you could be a better parent or partner.  Take a breath and really look at your children and family.  They adore you just the way you are. 

So should you.                                                                                          

∞Your running shoes.  Not the ones you exercise with to keep strong and healthy.  The running shoes that you think you have to wear so that you can be on the treadmill taking you to every party, every event, every thing that sometimes takes you away from your children and home.

What to replace it with:

∞Fancy pants. If you are feeling that you, the family or your home are looking “tired”, try some fancy pants!  Buy a new lipstick, switch the curtains in bedrooms with each other, rearrange furniture, use the good china on Wednesdays and splurge on bathroom scented soaps & lotions.  Be nice to yourself.                                                                                                                                                                     

∞A calm breath.  We tell and teach our children to relax and take a breath when they are feeling stressed or overwhelmed.  Often we don’t follow our own advice.  This works, we know it does.  Try it. 

∞Dedicated time.  There are 24 hours in the day – I know that’s not enough but that is what it is.  Children literally grow and change before your eyes.  Make each second, minute and hour count.  Read, play, cook, snuggle and fill each of their moments with you. If the well runs dry.  Don’t let it on your watch. 

What to keep the same:

∞Consistent and successful routines for your children and family. Even if you are the one who has to take a shower at night, or are the last one in the morning.  It’s not worth it to try to re-organize the morning routine.  It might sound like a good idea in the middle of the winter to shake up the ship. It's not.                                                                                                                                                                

∞A child’s security lovie. Don’t be tempted to replace it with a shiny, new Christmas blanket.  It’s not the same.                                                                                                                                                                      

∞French toast sticks & chicken nuggets in the freezer for weekday dinners.  Add fruit and vegetables to your dinner to set the model and wait for the cue from your 5 year old that they will try it too.   

∞The unwavering, unfailing, undeniable and unconditional love you have for each of your children and all of your family.  It really is all that matters.

Wishing you peace, harmony, happiness and love during 2013. 

Happy New Year. 

~Kate

 

What are the gifts you give to the people you love this holiday season?

In a world that is often loaded with the things of Christmas that we touch, ride, shake and eat we can lose sight of the most important gifts we give to those that we hold the dearest.  Gifts that you can’t put in a box with a bow.  Gifts that your children won’t ask for by name, or unwrap under a tree on Christmas morning.  But will celebrate their whole life.

 They are the gifts of love:

Peace. Give your children the gift of a peaceful home.  A home that is their soft landing in a world that gets harder each year.  A peaceful, calm place to lay their heads to dream about their life that they love.  This is the way they will learn to find peace within themselves.

Hope.  When you look at the world through your child’s eyes, you see hope.  Yes, hope for the toy they absolutely want or hope for the invitation to a prized event, but hope is so much more.  Hope is confidence.  It is optimism and assurance.  It is a gift that supports them when they try out for a team or meet a new friend for the first time.   

Faith.  Whatever you believe, your children will believe.  They will absolutely follow in your footsteps.  Faith in the world, faith in themselves, faith in a supreme being; it doesn’t really matter what we call this.  It just matters that it is.  Watch them when they listen to you.  They believe you – they have faith in you.

Joy.  Fill your house with laughter every day of the year.  Teach your children to find joy in quiet, small, ordinary parts of their life as well as in the “big deals”.  This is what will keep them rich in the moments that are most meaningful.

Merry Christmas – I hope your holiday is filled with the gifts of love.   

       “Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

The Conductor Polar Express